No, I’m not talking about a bank account – or at least not a financial one, anyway. Several months ago I had the privilege of listening to Anne Grady speak about work/life balance. I learned a lot about different personality types and how to best work with each one. She gave insight, tips and little tricks on which personalities work best together, and what to do when they don’t.
As a takeaway from her presentation, everyone in attendance received a copy of Anne’s book: 52 Strategies for Life, Love and Work. It has been my go-to on quiet nights; with a glass of wine in hand, of course. Earlier this week, as I sifted through a few chapters, I came across a section that reiterated the importance of balance; specifically as it relates to our everyday relationships.
Throughout the chapter, Anne touched on Stephen Covey’s book: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Explaining how each one of us has a bank account, an emotional one, that receives daily deposits and withdrawals. The way we ineract with others either fills that account up, or it slowly empties it.
You guys, relationships are hard. I get it. Every interaction we have with one another involves giving or taking away some sort of emotional energy. There are some people I wish I could spend 24/7 with [my fiancé, for example] and there are others that it literally just drains me to have a conversation with them. I’m sure we’ve all been there.
We often naively assume that what we feel/say is as important or valuable to the other person as it is to us [and vice-versa], when in reality, that might not always be the case. So we end up with our feelings hurt, or hurting others. Even if our intentions are good, they have to be meaningful to the other person or in the end it doesn’t matter what our intentions were.
We also have to remember that those little deposits and withdrawals, they add up. So identify those unbalanced relationships. Take responsibility for your part in them. Figure out who makes you happy, who brings you the most joy, and reciprocate it.